Day Twenty-Seven: Greek food. Roller skating birthday parties. Team Trivia. FEATHERS.

Well. I've been slacking a bit in the postings lately. Since Thursday, I have...

-Gotten the feathers in my hair! I'll post a photo later.
-Organized a volunteer/pay it forward project for my English 3B students.
-Purchased the following: Tzatziki sauce, bruchetta, roasted pine nut hummus, stuffed grape leaves, black bean Morningstar burgers, stuffed chickpea burgers, berries, tabouli, asparagus stuffed cannelloni... maybe I am meant to be Greek? I don't know.
-Fallen on my driveway. Twice.
-Gotten stuck in my driveway for 25 minutes (even with kitty litter and Beth pushing my car ha).
-Photographed a 30th birthday party at a roller rink (with only knowing about two people there). It was such a blast.
-Played guitar (un poquito).
-Drank Milky Way Lattes from Bitterend and French Vanilla coffee from Disneyworld. (:
-Played team trivia with wonderful co-workers.
-Semi-planned our spring break trip. CALI?!

Here is a brief photo summary:

I would like to go snowboarding soon. I have never gone.... or skiing. Or snowshoeing. I need to get on that. Anyone? (:

So my friend and I decided to continue doing Reverb-type questions longer than the 30 days, and we're coming up with a list of questions to answer on a Google Doc. I love it. I love the collaboration and the fact that you have someone else who is going through the same things/prompts that you are, and you can talk about it. I like when we're both on Google Docs and writing to each other back and forth in different colors. (: But the other day, I was thinking of questions that we can add to our list of prompts. Sometimes I get in moods where I just think. And wonder. And analyze. And I can't shut my brain off. This happens especially at night ...but it happened to me the other day when I was thinking of questions. I went to brush my teeth, and I thought of at least 5. I ran downstairs to write them down. Sometimes I wish I could STOP thinking about things. Or at least pause my thinking.

I realized that I'm doing these prompts mostly just to get through them. I'm not taking the time to write something I'm proud of or something that really comes from my heart / soul. There have been maybe two days that I've written something (for these prompts) that I really liked. Maybe that's okay. Maybe I need to write some crap and get through it. Or maybe I need to make more time to write things I like. I don't know the answer to that. When I have my students do free-writing, I tell them just to keep writing and don't stop. Don't think. Then afterward, you can weed through and pull out a line or paragraph that you really like, and go from there. The key part of that is "don't stop." I get frustrated when things aren't perfect, but I don't have time to perfect everything. I guess even if I don't love the writing I'm doing, it's still good for me to write... and it doesn't matter if everything's perfect.

I can say that, but I don't believe it. I hate when I do that. I know the "right thing" to say, but it's not in conjunction with what I believe and what I feel. Ugh.

I guess the one thing to take from this is I've learned that sometimes I need to write, but unrelated to the prompts. I need to write for me. Sometimes I just need to get it down and out of my head, so my brain will stop thinking. Some days, I'll have an idea that I want to write about, but I don't have time to do that AND the prompt writing. Balance. Life is about balance. Which is another thing that I know how to say, but not really to do. Ugh. Sometimes I frustrate myself.

Another thing that I feel like I need to get out of my brain.  Things I miss the most about college:

-Working at the Writing Center. Everything about it. Helping in labs. Having weekly ESL/DSS appointments. Building relationships with frequent "customers." Giving life advice along with writing advice. Kleiner Writing Right Where You Are. Tutoring Athletic Study Tables in writing. Drop-in hours and reading all types of papers. One-on-one consulting with students and having a REAL conversation about his/her paper. Motivated students. Conducting peer workshop groups. Interviewing potential employees. Training the new staff. Planning and presenting PD sessions.
-Creative Writing classes. Classes that did not count toward my major or minor, but I took anyway. In-class workshops. Staying up late to perfect a story that I was really proud of.
-Having time to hang out with friends and study together. Cook together. Go to dances and theater shows and Peppino's and Kleiner at 2 am.
-Sitting with a friend at Panera to share writing (over coffee) that we did. On our own. In our free time. Because we wanted to. Giving feedback.
-Spanish composition courses.
-Freedom to dress and look however you want.
-Organizing poetry/fiction workshops OUTSIDE of class. At someone's apartment. With appetizers and guitars. AND OUR PROFESSOR.
-Meeting people in random places.
-Writing essays. No, I'm not kidding. But do I only like writing essays because I enjoy writing and I'm usually fairly good at it? Would I still love writing if I wasn't good at it? Probably not. This is probably how a lot of my students feel. Do I say I hate math because it doesn't come naturally to me, even though I am pretty good at it? Do we only like the things that at which we excel? Hm.
-Time to go on trips and to warm places.
-Journaling. Going different places on campus to write.
-Presenting at ECWCA/writing conferences. Researching. Putting together presentations. Collaborating.

And from that list, I'm 98% positive that I'm pursuing the best thing for me right now.


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Writing Challenge Day 27
I'm doing a 31 day writing challenge, found on the Reverb website, designed to reflect on the past year and look forward to what's to come in 2011.

Ordinary Joy. Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?

Moments where I have felt ordinary joy this year:

-When a student stays after to talk to me for an hour about what college is like (because no one in his family has gone and he wasn't planning on it). The next day, he tells me he started two applications.
-When it's sunny during winter.
-Giving presents on Christmas that I spent a lot of time working on and planning.
-When I visit my family and my dog is SO excited to see me walk in the door.
-Buying something on super clearance that I have wanted for a while.
-Having time to read books (for fun) over break.
-Teaching Creative Writing. Everything about that class. Seeing such amazing improvement in students' writing.
-Spending time with people who understand my crazy need for adventure and travel.
-Deciding to buy patches from places that I've hiked so I can attach them to a daypack. (:
-Compliments from strangers.
-Planning trips/vacations or just staring at maps of the world and dreaming of places to visit.
-Cooking a new recipe (with someone... not as fun alone).
-Stargazing in the summertime.
-Good conversations with co-workers over tea.
-Having a number of people tell me they started "creating" things again partially because of me.
-Great finds at antique stores.
-When I put together an outfit that I've never worn before and REALLY feel like myself.
-Weekends in Chicago.