Day Fourteen: appreciating alone time. burning out. candles and yoga and ocean sounds.

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Writing Challenge Day 14
I'm doing a 31 day writing challenge, found on the Reverb website, designed to reflect on the past year and look forward to what's to come in 2011.

Appreciate. What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?


Alone time:
Sitting by myself.
Lighting candles.
Listening to ocean waves/spring rain/white noise.
Journaling.
Time with God.
Saying no to plans sometimes.
A Friday night in.
Drinking chai/tea/coffee.
Yoga.
Good workout.
Writing.
Painting.
Creating.
Sweatpants.
No makeup.
Ponytail.


If you knew me in college, you probably knew me as social. I could not function alone. I didn't like the silence or the time to think.

I.
need.
people.

I need affirmation and hugs and friends and good conversations. In college, I had no balance. I didn't say no to plans because I love hanging out with people. New coffee dates. Dinner. Art nights. Cooking together. Anything.

finding time to skateboard (:

In college, I couldn't even study alone. I had to have friends go to Kirkhof or the library or someone's house and we'd sit... with a movie on in the background, good snacks, good music, and conversation. All with our laptops and textbooks and papers spread everywhere. I love this. They are some of the best memories I have from college. Sleepovers in the "penthouse" in the library during exam week. Pulling all-nighters trying to finish a unit plan for Ed 310 or a 20 page Sociology paper. Staying up way too late because we were laying in the grass on blankets stargazing and talking.

presenting at ECWCA (writing center conferences)

Now, I think I'm starting to pull away from that. I'm undecided whether or not I like that. I live far enough away from most of my friends that I only seem them every few weeks. I'm so exhausted from a week of teaching that it's hard for me to fathom making plans on Friday nights. I would rather go to bed at 8. Usually, that doesn't happen... but I have learned to appreciate time alone and time to relax.

Younglife girls!

I am really good at burning myself out. In fact, I would say I'm a pro. I was like that in high school, too. I liked to be involved in everything: sports, musicals, Peer Listening, work, clubs, camps, Younglife, etc. I always got my work done, but I always have stuff after school until at least 6-7 pm. On top of all that, I somehow found time to have fun with friends. I think I was constantly exhausted. I didn't care.

Ballroom dance

I was the same way in college (except not freshman year). I had to balance working at the Writing Center, a full class load, rec sports, working out, being a Younglife leader, being a Campus Ministry student leader, mission trips, small groups, church, Springhill, clubs, my jewelry business, boyfriends, art projects... and I loved every second of it. Honestly. By my 5th year, I think I was ready to move on. Probably because I felt burned out. Now I miss it.




I think if I would have learned, in college, to appreciate alone time and time to relax, I would have been a little happier. Not that I wasn't happy. I was just trying to cram way too much into each day. I see that now. But I don't regret a second of it. I think I fit as much as I could into my college experience, even if I DID burn myself out.

I am getting better at doing things for myself. Finding time to paint. Cramming a yoga session in even when I want to go to bed. Making myself tea during my planning hour. Little things. So I appreciate finding a balance.

But if you called me and asked me to start an art project with you or have a dinner party or come stargaze at 10 pm when the weather's warm... I'm not going to say no. (: